List of one liners to use from life, shows and movies

I love coming up with cheesy quotes from shows and movies to put in cards and emails. Life goes so quick but it is still a good idea to put together a nice one liners list. Here are someAir Force Jokes one liners items I have now:

• What do you call a nervous pilot? Panicky Skywalker!
• How do you spot an Air Force fighter pilot at a party? Don't worry, they'll tell you.
• What's a pilot's favorite type of sandwich? A plain one!
  
• How do you know an Air Force officer is a morning person? They're up before the sun, briefing it.
• Why did the airman bring a ladder to the airplane? Because the seats were up in the air!
• What do you call a plane that doesn't bounce? A dead weight!
• How do you find a lost airplane? Seek and you shall glide!
• Why did the airman bring a pencil and paper to the flight? To draw some air-crafts!
• How do you confuse an Air Force pilot? Ask them for directions.
• Why did the Air Force pilot go broke? He lost his air-credit card!
• How do you know an Air Force officer is on vacation? They're wearing civilian clothes.
• How does an Air Force pilot greet you? With a high altitude!
• Why did the Air Force officer bring a glass of water to the briefing? He wanted to make a point.
• What do you call an Air Force pilot without a girlfriend? Homeless.
• What's an Air Force pilot's favorite board game? Risk, because they always want to be on top.
• How does an Air Force pilot apologize? I'm sorry if I offended you. Now, let me show you my flying skills.
• What's the first thing an Air Force pilot says at a job interview? Hold my beer.
• Why did the Air Force officer bring a ladder to the bar? He wanted to reach new heights!
  
• How many Air Force pilots does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but they'll do it at Mach speed.
• What do you call a helicopter that can't stop bragging? A chop-otter!
• What do you call an Air Force pilot who's always losing? A civilian.
• How do airplanes make decisions? They wing it and go with the flow!
• Why did the airplane hire a lawyer? It was involved in a high-flying lawsuit!
• What's an Air Force pilot's favorite kind of music? Heavy Air-metal.
• Why do Air Force pilots make great comedians? They always have a captive audience.
• How do you know if there's a pilot at your party? They'll tell you within the first five minutes!
• Why did the pilot go to art school? He wanted to learn how to draw some attention!
• How do you make an Air Force pilot sweat? Turn off the air conditioning.
• What do you call an Air Force pilot who's always on time? A jet setter!
• What's the difference between a fighter pilot and a jet engine? The jet engine stops whining when you turn it off.
• Why did the Air Force pilot bring a parachute to the amusement park? Just in case the roller coaster goes Mach 2.
• How do airplanes communicate with each other? They wing it!
• How do airplanes apologize? They wing it and say sorry!
• What's an Air Force pilot's favorite movie? Top Gun, of course!
• What do you call an Air Force pilot who's lost his wings? A pedestrian.
  
• How do you know someone was in the Air Force? Don't worry, they'll let you know within the first five minutes of meeting them.
• What do you call an Air Force pilot who's lost his mind? A navigator.
• What's the favorite exercise of Air Force pilots? Running late.
• Why don't pilots trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
• What's an Air Force pilot's favorite type of car? A supersonic.
• What do you call a helicopter that doesn't fit in? A misfit!
• Why did the airplane become a musician? It had perfect pitch!
• What do you call a jet that's always in a hurry? A plain plane!
• Why did the airplane bring a parachute to the party? It wanted to drop in unexpectedly!
• What's an Air Force pilot's favorite type of cookie? Air biscuits.
• What's the difference between an Air Force pilot and a jet engine mechanic? The mechanic can actually fix things.
• What do you call a fighter jet that can sing? An aeropera!
• Why do pilots always carry a pen and paper? In case they need to air-write!
• What do you call a fighter jet that tells jokes? A fly comedian!
• What did the pilot say to the ground crew? I'm plane tired!
• Why did the Air Force pilot bring a ladder to the briefing? He wanted to raise the bar.
• Why did the pilot always carry a calculator? He was good at air-ithmetic!
• What do you call a pilot who can't swim? A flight risk!
  
• How do you know the Air Force is nearby? You can hear their PowerPoint presentations.
• Why did the Air Force pilot become a doctor? He wanted to prescribe a lot of sick days.
• Why did the pilot bring a map to the art gallery? To wing it and find his way around!
• What do you call a pilot who doesn't like to fly? A grounded individual!
• How do you know an Air Force officer is having a bad day? They're following the regulations.
• How do you know an Air Force pilot has been using the computer? There's whiteout on the screen.
• Why don't airplanes like talking to balloons? They think they're full of hot air!
• How do you become an airline pilot? Just plane on it!
• Why did the Air Force officer bring a pencil to the flight? In case he had to draw his weapon.
• Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many Air-Fractions!
• What's an Air Force pilot's favorite part of the day? Happy hour.
• How do fighter pilots greet each other? Jet's go!
• Why did the Air Force officer bring a ladder to the bar? He wanted to reach new heights.
• Why did the Air Force officer wear a helmet to bed? He wanted to protect his dreams.
• What do you call an Air Force officer who can't swim? Skipper.
  
• Why don't air force pilots like winter? Cold air gives them jet lag!
• What's an Air Force pilot's favorite type of music? Fly-fi.
• Why do airplanes never have good manners? They always wing it!
• Why did the jet take a trip to the dentist? It needed a plane cleaning!